A long time ago (last summer) in a place far far away (Detroit, New York or something) there was a power wheels race car called Red Lotus, crying alone in the pits.
All of the sudden, out of nowhere with a screech of tires and a puff of tire smoke appeared the Fairy Godfather (after all, Fairy Godmother wants “nothing to do with that dangerous racing stuff.”)
The Fairy Godfather asked Red Lotus “What’s the matter little race car?”
“Well Fairy Godfather, every time I try to catch up with the other cars my tires just pop!”
“Well little car, what you need are magic tires! and please call me FGF – all my drinking buddies laugh when someone calls me ‘Fairy’ ”
And with a wave if his enchanted tire iron POOF! a magical tire appeared!
“Really?” said Red Lotus “That rim won’t hold up for 20 seconds on a power wheels track.”
“Hey!” exclaimed FGF “You get a magical tire, you can figure out the rim yourself!”
And so Red Lotus did figure out the rim herself. Thus was born the Quad Bolt, Flange Welded, Wood Spaced, super rim!
And all the rest of the season Red Lotus didn’t pop a single tire – at least not a rear tire…
Then one day when all the races for the season were over, once again Red Lotus was sitting alone in the pits crying.
With a squeal of tires and more blue smoke FGF appeared!
“What are you bawling about now? Didn’t I give you magic tires? Didn’t they last the entire season with out popping?”
“yes, they are wonderful” sobbed Red Lotus “but” (there’s always a ‘but’) “my front tires keep popping and the hubs I made suck.”
FGF thought for a minute and said “so why don’t you buy some real tires and make your own hubs to hold them?” “Here, I’ll show you how:”
With a wave of his magic Tire Iron POOF pieces started to appear!
“Yum!” squealed Red Lotus “Pink frosted doughnuts!”
—- CRUNCH —-
“These are awful doughnuts, they taste like Styrofoam!”
—- SMACK —-
FGF knocks the doughnut out of Red Lotus’s mouth. “Those aren’t doughnuts, they’re hub patterns!”
“Put them on the tube like this”
“Pack it in sand”
“And pour molten aluminum all over it”
“And you get something like this”
“Ewww” said Red Lotus “That’s gross!”
“Well its not done yet, you need a little time turning it on a lathe to turn it into something beautiful”
“Now you have your solid aluminum, hand cast, personally machined unbreakable super hub!”
And with a hearty belch FGF vanished leaving Red Lotus to do a whole bunch of work.
Tune in next time for the story of the PPPBBB – Pronounced:
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